galen

A Social Decision

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 00:09:37 GMT

I've decided that I'm not going to get into Steampunk. I'd rather get into Steamreggae. Ya man!

It's frikkin' hot

Mon, 27 Jul 2009 02:26:27 GMT

There is no central air here. Most of the year, it's not needed. I'm thinking of crawling into T's room. She's got a wall unit.

Finally, an easy to understand version

Fri, 12 Dec 2008 02:50:00 GMT

'Twas the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period preceding the annual Yuletide celebration, and throughout our place of residence, kinetic activity was not in evidence among the possessors of this potential, including that species of domestic rodent known as Mus musculus. Hosiery was meticulously suspended from the forward edge of the wood burning caloric apparatus, pursuant to our anticipatory pleasure regarding an imminent visitation from an eccentric philanthropist among whose folkloric appellations is the honorific title of St. Nicholas.

The prepubescent siblings, comfortably ensconced in their respective accommodations of repose, were experiencing subconscious visual hallucinations of variegated fruit confections moving rhythmically through their cerebrums. My conjugal partner and I, attired in our nocturnal head coverings, were about to take slumberous advantage of the hibernal darkness when upon the avenaceous exterior portion of the grounds there ascended such a cacophony of dissonance that I felt compelled to arise with alacrity from my place of repose for the purpose of ascertaining the precise source thereof.

Hastening to the casement, I forthwith opened the barriers sealing this fenestration, noting thereupon that the lunar brilliance without, reflected as it was on the surface of a recent crystalline precipitation, might be said to rival that of the solar meridian itself - thus permitting my incredulous optical sensory organs to behold a miniature airborne runnered conveyance drawn by eight diminutive specimens of the genus Rangifer, piloted by a minuscule, aged chauffeur so ebullient and nimble that it became instantly apparent to me that he was indeed our anticipated caller. With his ungulate motive power travelling at what may possibly have been more vertiginous velocity than patriotic alar predators, he vociferated loudly, expelled breath musically through contracted labia, and addressed each of the octet by his or her respective cognomen - "Now Dasher, now Dancer..." et al. - guiding them to the uppermost exterior level of our abode, through which structure I could readily distinguish the concatenations of each of the 32 cloven pedal extremities.

As I retracted my cranium from its erstwhile location, and was performing a 180-degree pivot, our distinguished visitant achieved - with utmost celerity and via a downward leap - entry by way of the smoke passage. He was clad entirely in animal pelts soiled by the ebony residue from oxidations of carboniferous fuels which had accumulated on the walls thereof. His resemblance to a street vendor I attributed largely to the plethora of assorted playthings which he bore dorsally in a commodious cloth receptacle.

His orbs were scintillant with reflected luminosity, while his submaxillary dermal indentations gave every evidence of engaging amiability. The capillaries of his malar regions and nasal appurtenance were engorged with blood which suffused the subcutaneous layers, the former approximating the coloration of Albion's floral emblem, the latter that of the Prunus avium, or sweet cherry. His amusing sub- and supralabials resembled nothing so much as a common loop knot, and their ambient hirsute facial adornment appeared like small, tabular and columnar crystals of frozen water.

Clenched firmly between his incisors was a smoking piece whose grey fumes, forming a tenuous ellipse about his occiput, were suggestive of a decorative seasonal circlet of holly. His visage was wider than it was high, and when he waxed audibly mirthful, his corpulent abdominal region undulated in the manner of impectinated fruit syrup in a hemispherical container. He was, in short, neither more nor less than an obese, jocund, multigenarian gnome, the optical perception of whom rendered me visibly frolicsome despite every effort to refrain from so being. By rapidly lowering and then elevating one eyelid and rotating his head slightly to one side, he indicated that trepidation on my part was groundless.

Without utterance and with dispatch, he commenced filling the aforementioned appended hosiery with various of the aforementioned articles of merchandise extracted from his aforementioned previously dorsally transported cloth receptacle. Upon completion of this task, he executed an abrupt about- face, placed a single manual digit in lateral juxtaposition to his olfactory organ, inclined his cranium forward in a gesture of leave-taking, and forthwith effected his egress by renegotiating (in reverse) the smoke passage. He then propelled himself in a short vector onto his conveyance, directed a musical expulsion of air through his contracted oral sphincter to the antlered quadrupeds of burden, and proceeded to soar aloft in a movement hitherto observable chiefly among the seed-bearing portions of a common weed. But I overheard his parting exclamation, audible immediately prior to his vehiculation beyond the limits of visibility: "Ecstatic Yuletide to the planetary constituency, and to that self same assemblage, my sincerest wishes for a salubriously beneficial and gratifyingly pleasurable period between sunset and dawn."

Check This Out

Mon, 01 Dec 2008 05:55:59 GMT

A local filmmaker is making a poly webseries. Here's the latest episode.

The Family Episode 2

Top Ten Reasons McCain wouldn't look Obama in the eye during 1st Debate

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 20:38:15 GMT

10. Throws out back when he cranes his neck that high
9. Is actually an alien who sees out of his ears
8. Has double vision and was focusing in on the wrong Obama
7. Afraid Obama's charisma will be so bright it'll blind him
6. Eyes are all irritated from the $5000 makeup job he just got
5. Turning his head that way cuts off the live feed in his ear with Karl Rove
4. Kept staring at Obama's flag pin and thinking, "Oh Shit, THAT's what I forgot"
3. Gets stirring feelings in strange places when he gazes into Obama's eyes
2. Pastor Muthee convinced him Obama is a warlock who can turn him into an iguana with his stare
1. Can't stop habitually looking around for Sarah Palin's ass

Movie meme

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 07:11:35 GMT

Snatched from kiki39

1. What movie have you seen the most times in the theater? How many times?
Star Wars, six times in it's initial release. I've lost count with all the re-releases.

2. What was the last movie you walked out of in the theater?
Some movie where Peter O'Toole was a rich guy who thought he was either Jesus Christ or Jack the Ripper..

3. What is the first movie you remember seeing in a theater?
Pinocchio

4. What is your favorite movie soundtrack?
Star Wars. John Williams rocks.

5. Have you ever dressed up as a movie character for Halloween?
Two Halloweens ago, I was Inspector Clouseau. And yes, I can do the accent, pretty damn well if I say so myself. :)

6. What was the first R-rated movie you ever saw? Were you allowed or did you sneak?
A very obscure movie called Thunderbolt and Lightfoot, with Clint Eastwood and Jeff Bridges. I was with my parents at the drive in.

7. Star Wars (original trilogy) or Lord of the Rings?
Star Wars, because if it wasn't for the first one, the second one wouldn't have happened (Peter Jackson says as much himself).

8. Pacino or DeNiro?
I will not choose. I want both.

9. Titanic...did it suck or was it great?
Brilliant. By using a very traditional tragic love story, Cameron was able to turn what would have been a mindless Irwin Allen disaster movie into something which gave the viewer a sense of the devastating emotional loss the real life passengers and their families suffered.

10. What's your take on Cassavetes?
Hey, if Columbo likes him, he's good with me. :)

11. Favorite John Hughes character?
Del Griffith from Planes, Trains, and Automobiles

12. What movie gives you a boner (or makes you tingle)?
Secretary

13. What movie always makes you cry like the big puss you are?
West Side Story and E.T.

14. What's the furthest you've ever gotten in a movie theater? (i.e, second base...)
Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever made out in a movie theater. Am I missing out?

15. Speaking of sports metaphors, what's your favorite sports movie?
Either Rocky or the Bad News Bears (original)

16. (a) Favorite... teen movie?
The Breakfast Club

(b)...Quentin Tarantino movie?
After Hours. Oh, wait... that's Scorcese, isn't it? ;)

(c)...Bill Murray movie?
Groudhog Day. A fantasy movie that requires almost no special effects, plus one of his only comedies with real heart.

(d)...romantic comedy?
Love Actually. I get all mushy just thinking about it.

(e)...gangster movie?
The Godfather. btw, it's been fully restored and is coming to blu-ray in the fall. Woohoo!

(f)...horror movie?
Toss up between the Haunting (original) and Poltergeist. Love me a good ghost story.

(g)...made for TV movie?
Sarah Plain and Tall. Glenn Close and Christopher Walken both playing sweet, noble, and not at all psychotic people.

(h)...director?
Steven Spielberg

(i)...drug movie?
Cheech and Chong's Next Movie

17. What movie have you seen already but will never, ever, ever watch again?
Misery. Once was enough (shudders).

18. What movie are you embarrassed to really like?
About a dozen cheesy 70's movies. Let's see... Towering Inferno, Rollercoaster, Planet of the Apes, Golden Voyage of Sinbad, Herbie Rides Again etc...

19. What movie should be remade ASAP?
Jason and the Argonauts

21. For the love of everything that's sacred, please someone stop (insert answer) from making another movie!
Uwe Boll

22. What movie do all your friends love but you think is whatevs?
Got a whole list: Pulp Fiction, Star Trek II the Wrath of Khan, The Empire Strikes Back, Goodfellas

23. What movie do you love but all your friends think is whatevs?
Ed Wood

24. If you could hump/date/marry any movie character, who would it be?
Morticia from The Addams Family

25. Best...movie....ever?
Can't settle on just one... Citizen Kane, The Godfather, Lawrence of Arabia, Seven Samurai

26. Book you wish would be made into a movie, and who would direct it?
Illusions. Me. :D

May the Fourth be with you

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 22:16:33 GMT

Happy Independence Day

THIS is what I'm constantly having to prove that I am NOT

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 05:15:38 GMT

Dimitri (shudder!)

Like Cenk says, it's guys like this that make it hard for the rest of us.

Aaaaaugh!

Sat, 03 May 2008 22:31:41 GMT

As of today, I am a Teenager's Dad! Does that mean I have to start wearing dark suspendered socks and golfing shirts? Listen to dorky music? Say things like, "when I was your age, I respected my elders"?

Somehow I just don't feel like I fit the part. Got to go now and buy a Winnebago.

Top Ten Less Profound Reasons I Support Obama

Sat, 03 May 2008 22:20:30 GMT

10. Taught me how "divisive" is pronounced
9. Is young enough to know the words to "Conjunction Junction"
8. I find flag lapel pins almost as annoying as "baby on board" stickers
7. Highly unlikely to choose Lieberman or Huckabee as a running mate
6. I can't bowl either
5. He can pronounce "nuclear"
4. He reminds me of my son's namesake
3. Jed Bartlett isn't real. Damn!
2. Anyone who's got the mainstream media gunning for them must be doing something right
1. I will be able to tolerate the Hall of Presidents in Disney World again

Americans are NOT bitter

Thu, 17 Apr 2008 03:13:17 GMT

They're tangy with an insouciant hint of lemon zest.

History

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 17:30:25 GMT

Obama addressed the whole issue with his pastor yesterday in one of the most stirring, inspiring political speeches I've ever heard. Typically, the MSM is diluting it into meaningless soundbites and spinning it into fodder for more sensationalistic "controversy".

If you haven't heard the whole speech, you owe it to yourself to do so.

Let Bartlett be Bartlett

Blu-ray: Betamax's revenge

Tue, 19 Feb 2008 09:34:44 GMT

Just a short while ago in Japan, Toshiba announced it's discontinuing the HD-DVD format, leaving Sony's Blu-Ray as the de facto standard for high definition discs.

I remember the last format war Sony was embroiled in, when it championed its Betamax videotape format over rival VHS. Though I never owned a beta machine, I remember seeing the difference in quality in many of my friends' homes.

Beta had better color translation, less noise, and could handle black areas much better than VHS. You'd think that would have been enough to secure Beta's lead. But it was a different market. Back then, for most people picture quality meant that the screen didn't constantly scroll up due to bad vertical hold, and that the rabbit ears were pointed in the right direction.

It didn't help that Sony did practically nothing to market their format's superior quality. That, coupled with the company's stubborn insistence in controlling the manufacture of the hardware while VHS licensed out to practically everybody, doomed the format. Videophiles like myself retreated to the world of laserdisc to escape the limits of VHS (or smearvision, as we called it).

I'm happy to see Sony succeed this time, not because I hold any love for the corporation, but because I believe Blu-Ray has two advantages over HD-DVD. First, Blu has much higher storage capacity, 50 gigabytes per disc as opposed to 30. Second, the discs themselves are made of a much more durable, scratch resistant substance than standard DVD. Considering how hard the kiddo is on discs, this is a big plus for the future.

Truth be told, though, I'm more glad that the format war is over, no matter who the victor was. With VHS and Beta, there was a huge market clamoring for this new technology. A winner was all but guaranteed, since folks were unlikely to shrug their shoulders and stick with "what came before". With digital discs, there's already a well established format: standard DVD. That, and the fledgling market of digital downloads, meant that there was only a short window of opportunity for High Def discs to get a foothold.

And I'll say right now that the difference in quality over standard DVD is so dramatic, that even my complete technophobe (at least with home theater) primary partner was stunned when she first witnessed High Def. And when you blow it up to fill a wall, like we have in our home, it's even more obvious.

So I'm glad to say that one more format war is over. About damn time, too. Let the Blu Discs Spin.

The Grind

Fri, 18 Jan 2008 00:29:26 GMT

It's been a while since I've been out on the dance floor. Will be there tonight. Hope to see some familiar faces.

May I be the first to say...

Wed, 04 Jul 2007 17:11:48 GMT

May the Fourth be with you.

Somehow, I knew I'd get this one

Tue, 22 May 2007 06:38:13 GMT

Your Score: Jimmy Stewart

You scored 11% Tough, 9% Roguish, 66% Friendly, and 14% Charming!

You are the fun and friendly boy next door, the classic nice guy who still manages to get the girl most of the time. You're every nice girl's dreamboat, open and kind, nutty and charming, even a little mischievous at times, but always a real stand up guy. You're dependable and forthright, and women are drawn to your reliability, even as they're dazzled by your sense of adventure and fun. You try to be tough when you need to be, and will gladly stand up for any damsel in distress, but you'd rather catch a girl with a little bit of flair. Your leading ladies include Jean Arthur and Donna Reed, those sweet girl-next-door types.

Find out what kind of classic dame you'd make by taking the Classic Dames Test.

Link: The Classic Leading Man Test written by gidgetgoes on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Austin Bound

Thu, 30 Nov 2006 04:25:30 GMT

The kiddo and I will be in Austin from December 15 to the 25 (yes, we're flying on Christmas. I just hope we don't run into any reindeer). Though obviously we'll be spending most of our time with relatives, I'm hoping to get together with a few friends during that time as well. Hope to see everyone soon.

Happy Halloween

Wed, 01 Nov 2006 03:58:45 GMT

As a treat especially for all my friends back in Austin, I present the following parody.

For those of you in other parts of the country, Hippie Hollow is the only nude beach in the state of Texas, located on Lake Travis just a short drive from Austin.

(Sung to the tune of The Headless Horseman from Disney’s
The Legend of Ichabod and Mr. Toad)

Just gather ‘round and I’ll elucidate
On what goes on down by the lake
Round the rocky shoreline the freaks and hippies
Get together for their clotheless jamborees

There’s things with moles and fleshy thighs
And some with tits about this size
Some are fat and and some are thin
But all are wearing just their skin

I tell you brother, you will stay awake
Remembrin’ what you saw down by the lake

When the freaks have a naked jamboree
They hang it out with shameless glee
The streakers are wild, but the one that’s cursed
Is the dickless horseman, he’s the worst

That’s right, John Bobbit’s got nothin’ on him

When he goes a joggin cross the land
Holding a dildo in his hand
Hippies take one look and scream
And say, “Let’s go to Barton Springs”

Beware take care he has no “thing”

Well, there’s no spook like that neutered dude
They don’t like him, and he’s really rude
He swears by all the critters in the lake
He’ll get himself a one-eyed trouser snake

They say he’s tired of his phony cock
He’s got a yen to make a swap
So he rides one night each year
To find a dick in the hollow here

Now he likes ‘em little, he likes ‘em big
Topped with a tickler or a rib
Black or white or even tan
He needs a “little fireman”

With a hip hip and a flippity flop
He’s out looking for a cock to chop
So don’t try to figure out a plan
You can’t reason with a dickless man

Now if you doubt this tale as so
I met that spook just a year ago
Now, I didn’t stop to see the show
But made for the Oasis patio

For once you reach that bar my friends
The ghost is through his power ends

So when you’re ridin’ home tonight
Make for the Oasis with all your might
He’ll be down in the Hollow there
To weed-whack a patch of pubic hair

With a hip hip and a flippity flop
He’s out looking for a dong to swap
So don’t try to figure out a plan
You can’t reason with a dickless man

Movie with a lot of cute chicks

Mon, 30 Oct 2006 22:42:51 GMT

I finally saw March of the Penguins yesterday. What a gorgeous film. I'm glad I waited until we got the big screen working to watch it, as some of the Antarctic scenery is truly breathtaking.

I found myself having to constantly remind myself of the scale of the film. We're used to thinking of penguins as small, cat-sized creatures, and most species are. Emperors, though, stand about 3 feet tall, and can weigh 60 - 80 pounds.

Emperor chicks are one of the few baby birds who are actually cute. The site of them after having eaten following their fathers' first return, their bellies engorged, with such a look of satisfaction and contentment, is irresistably adorable.

The story of the making of the film is just as amazing as the film itself. The filmmakers spent a year living in the harshest climate in the world, trekking out onto the ice in sometimes unbelievably harsh conditions. It was worth all the struggle and sacrifice, of course.

This film illustrates the reason I'm a home theater nut. People still look at me funny when I tell them about our setup, and then find out that I have no cable, no satellite, no TV broadcast receiver of any kind. I prefer to choose my own programming, and am happily separated from the constant barrage of cheap fearmongering and brain-dead salesmanship that's pumped into most people's homes.

Give me real life fathers and mothers protecting their one egg against the elements over any cheesy, make-believe sitcom family any day.

Looking for Wheels to Borrow

Mon, 17 Apr 2006 01:31:45 GMT

Does anyone in Austin have a car we might rent out for the next month or so? Our Altima died on us last month, and we really don't want to purchase a new car this close to our move, that we'll then have to transport all the way up to Seattle.

We've been trying to make do with just the one vehicle, but it's become a bit of a strain. We're not looking for anything fancy at all, though an automatic transmission would be nice.

We could pay about $200.00, which would cost us less than a rental agency.

Any leads will be appreciated.

Dancing and Tears

Sun, 26 Jun 2005 19:10:46 GMT

I had a very emotionally wrenching Body Choir this morning. One of my friends from BC, a man named John, was not there. During the Opening Circle, we found out that he's in the hospital, diagnosed with Leukemia.

His wife, Anna, was scheduled to facilitate this morning, but of course, she wasn't there. Oskar did a fine job of jumping in and taking over.

Anna and John are such a fixture of BC, as is John's seeing eye dog, Dylan. They are both such beacons of love, joy and acceptance. It hit me hard to know that they're facing such hardship.

The outpouring of emotion and support from the folks was wonderful. I hadn't quite gotten how much this little community has come to mean to me until this morning.

We're organizing a meeting schedule to go visit him, so that he and Anna don't get bombarded by well-wishers all at once. I will definitely be in on the rotation.

5 things I recently wished I had said

Sat, 14 May 2005 05:35:50 GMT

All right, red_tanya. I'm game...

1. I don't have to defend it, it speaks for itself, you snob!
2. Only liberals are real men.
3. There are many decaffeinated brands that are just as tasty as the real thing. Try one. Pleeeeease.
4. Wow. You really like to talk about yourself, even when I've stopped listening.
5. Have a good life.

Smuggled from Roninjedi (who else?)

Sat, 14 May 2005 05:28:51 GMT

I've been realizing this about myself lately...

You scored as Chewbacca.

</td>

Chewbacca

69%

Yoda

67%

Anakin Skywalker

61%

Obi Wan Kenobi

61%

R2-D2

58%

Mace Windu

56%

Padme Amidala

53%

Darth Vader

53%

Clone Trooper

44%

C-3PO

36%

General Grievous

33%

Emperor Palpatine

17%

Which Revenge of the Sith Character are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Since it's making the rounds...

Fri, 25 Feb 2005 21:08:43 GMT

10 things I've done that you probably haven't (tried not to repeat too much of my earlier meme)

1. Been a professional puppeteer
2. Been a professional standup comic
3. Shook hands with John Williams after he just finished conducting the Superman theme
4. EST
5. Had a wall fall on me but not hit me 'cause I was standing where the window fell
6. Flushed a toilet, causing the entire apartment building's plumbing to explode (followed by eerie mist coming out of the toilet bowl)
7. Saw Monty Python perform in person
8. Hitch-hiked across Texas
9. Did the design and layout for a high-speed electronic circuit board
10. Turned down an invitation to become a Moonie

Today's Top Ten List

Wed, 16 Feb 2005 16:17:50 GMT

Top Ten Orc Pickup Lines

10. Can I buy you a grog?
9. You know, I’m half elf.
8. What’s a nice girl like you doing in a festering, hellish wasteland like this?
7. My warg just had puppies.
6. What say we get something to eat besides maggoty bread?
5. Saruman’s a close personal friend of mine.
4. I’ve got a really big troll.
3. I was born in a slimy subterranean mud pit in Isengard. Where are you from?
2. Graaaaaawwwwooolllllllhhhhhh!!!!!!
1. Hey baby, wanna taste man-flesh?